Knowledge of Good and Evil

I lie here in my warm bed, sandwiched between my two big dogs, enjoying my flannel sheets on this cold February morning, and I wonder . . .

How many people are hunkered in their cars trying to keep warm because they don't have the money to pay the rent? How many families are huddled around space heaters because their heat has been turned off?

At this moment, all around the world, how many people are lying on cots or cold stone floors in prisons or refugee camps? How many are in fear of despotic governments? How many are ravaged by disease and malnutrition?

How many animals are shivering and starving because they've been abandoned by their owners? How many pets will be euthanized today because someone doesn't believe in spaying or neutering? How many species will be nearer extinction due to man's exploitation?

Stay with me - How many spouses are plotting their escape from bad marriages? How many are breaking their vows of fidelity? How many parents are contemplating a wayward child, and wondering where they went wrong? How many single people are lying awake, aching with loneliness? How many couples are mourning the loss of a child, or the emptiness of a womb? Right now, how many children are in orphanages or foster care, wondering if anyone will ever love them? How many elderly languish in nursing homes with no one to visit them? How many people, at this very moment, are just going through the motions of life, but not really living?

This day, how many homes are being robbed? How many paychecks are being gambled away? How many women are being abused, beaten, raped? At this moment, how many children are being molested? How many young people, right now, around the world, are being sold into prostitution? How many babies are being aborted? At this instant, how many lives are being snuffed out by violence? How many people will never see the sun rise again, because of racism, prejudice, terrorism and war?

And I am glad that I don't know. Relieved that there is no survey or research firm that can tally up those numbers. It is too much for me to bear. The weight of the pain, longing, horror and sin of the world is too much to contemplate. It is overwhelming. I thank God for my sheltered existence; sometimes I already feel like I know too much.

Yet God knows. He knows the exact number of each of these things at any moment of any day. More than that, He knows the times and places, and even more importantly, He knows the names and faces. God is not a statistician. There are no faceless masses with Him. How do You bear it, God? You gave us dominion over the world, and what have we done with it?

You didn't want us to know. You wanted to protect us, to shelter us. "Don't eat of the tree," You said. But we couldn't stand the not knowing. Who'd have thought that eating some fruit would open such a Pandora's box?

2/14/06